Showing posts with label Gratitude. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Gratitude. Show all posts

Friday, August 5, 2022

11 Ways to Increase Hope and Inspiration



When I think about the times in my life I've grown the most or taken next steps or had breakthrough experiences, they almost always happened because hope or inspiration showed up in my life in a profound way. 

Usually, that hope or inspiration was connected to the actions of someone else. Someone lifted me up, inspired me, or provided me with the spark I needed at that time. That's what leaders do. They help you take that next step. They help you find the hope or inspiration to believe something greater is possible.

So I wanted to share a few thoughts on ways to inspire others, some ways to offer hope. If it seems like you've experienced more despair and hopelessness recently, you're not alone. I think that's a common experience for educators right now.

In fact, as I think through this list, I realize how my leadership has fallen short in practicing these behaviors. It's easy to focus on the negative and forget what we can do to meet needs and lift up others. We need to be mindful of how we can help each other and take our important next steps.

11 Ways to Increase Hope and Inspiration


1. Be authentic.

Share your failures and admit your mistakes. Be humble. Be honest about your struggles. As John Maxwell says, "When we share our successes, that may be impressive. But when we share our failures, that's inspiring." Your resilience in the face of setbacks is inspiring to others.

2. Show someone their strengths.

The educators who inspired me the most believed in me the most. They were encouraging to me. They showed me something in myself I didn't see in myself until they came into my life. When someone believes in you, that inspires you and gives you hope.

4. Take productive risks.

No one was ever inspired by someone who was playing it safe or just trying to protect their own comfort. It's inspiring when someone takes a leap, when they just go for it, when they take bold action. You have to be a risk taker to be a difference maker.
"To bring about change, you must not be afraid to take the first step. We will fail when we fail to try." Rosa Parks

5. Demonstrate passion and commitment.

Passion and commitment are evidence of how much you care. When you have strong values and work to protect and defend those values, that inspires. It shows you have a vision and want to create and build something that is worthwhile and important. Your passion is contagious.

6. Grow yourself.

Before you can inspire others to grow, you have to be willing to grow yourself. Be disciplined. Learn something every day. And share your learning with others. Your example will inspire.



7. Stand for something good and selfless.

People are inspired by something bigger than themselves. They want to do something that matters, that makes a difference, that gives their life meaning and significance. When you stand for something noble and upright, others will be inspired to do the same.

8. Listen to understand.

People are inspired and have hope when they feel seen and understood. When people know that you care about their perspective and will listen to their ideas, they will be more open and optimistic about other people's ideas. 

9. Stay calm in the face of adversity.

Inspiring leaders know things are almost never as bad as they seem. And they also know in just about every crisis there are also great opportunities. You'll help others the most when you remain steadfast and unshakable in the midst of a storm.

10. Validate emotions.

I've just learned this in the last few years. Emotions are so important. When we validate someone's experience, that is powerful. It says to them that you care about them. It's tough to have inspiration or hope if you don't feel psychologically safe, if you feel like your feelings don't matter.

11. Be grateful.

Gratitude inspires. Cicero famously observed, "Gratitude is not only the greatest of the virtues, but the parent of all the others." If we want more hope and want to share more hope with others, there may be no better way than with gratitude. Never stop seeing the little miracles all around you. 

What inspires you and gives you hope? How could you take these ideas deeper? Leave a comment below or respond on Facebook or Twitter. I would love to hear from you.

Sunday, February 9, 2020

5 Simple Habits to Build Connection With Your Students


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Creating stronger connections with your students doesn't require grand gestures. But it does require some intentional behaviors on the part of the teacher. It requires taking action.

But these actions can be simple in the sense that they don't require any extra time. But that doesn't mean it's easy. They do require showing up with a certain emotional readiness, and they require making the effort to work at the interactions you're having each day.


"Every interaction is an opportunity 
for building relationships."

For elementary school teachers who see the same kids all day, these things may seem almost too obvious. I don’t know for certain, but I’m guessing these things might be more common in elementary.

But in middle school and high school, where teachers see so many different students each day, and the amount of time is so limited, it seems more likely that these things aren’t prioritized as much as they should be. We might tend to focus our energy on other things, but kids of all ages need us to take the leadership to create a warm classroom environment.

Here are 5 things you can do to build connection. If you already do them, you might try to do them even more, or more effectively. Just writing this post is a reminder to me that I can do better.

1. Smile

Every kid wants to feel like they are important, valued, and loved. They want to feel like they matter and that their teacher likes them. They also want to feel like their teacher enjoys them and enjoys teaching them. So smile. That's one of the best ways you can show warmth and care toward your students. 

But don't be fake about it. Fake smiles don't work. Kids can see right through that. You have to prepare yourself emotionally to be fully ready to teach with your heart. When you arrive for school with a full heart, your smile will shine through.

2. Make eye contact

Lots of kids are hurting or have been hurt, and they're moving through their day with their heads down, avoiding interaction because they either lack confidence or think that someone else will hurt them. But these kids need someone to see them. They need someone to notice them and connect with them eye to eye.

Eye contact lets your students know you have their attention. It shows them you're paying attention to them. When they are speaking, it shows them you're listening to them.

I've found that teachers often think they're making eye contact with their students, but they're speaking in the general direction of the class, or they only make eye contact with one side of the room, or with certain students. 

Search out and find the eyes of all the students in your classroom. Really see them, hear them, and understand them.

3. Call students by name

Dale Carnegie said, "A person's name is to him or her the sweetest and most important sound in any language." When you call your students by name, you are connecting with their identity, their individuality. 

Learn the names of all your students as soon as possible. As a teacher, I would always make it a point to remember names the first day of school. The students would see me struggle, make mistakes, but continue to practice as I went around the room saying their names until I could get them all. 

Make sure you learn to say their names correctly. There were names that were tricky for me over the years. Other people might be able to get them easily, but I had to work at it. I wanted the student to know it mattered to me to say their name correctly, and I would apologize if I didn't get it right.

I think most teachers know it's important to learn student names. But are you intentional about saying the student's name regularly? Do you make it a point to try to say every student's name every time they are in your class? I suspect many teachers are missing lots of opportunities to call students by name.

If a student is in trouble or the teacher needs their attention, you can bet they will hear their name then. But students need to hear their name on a regular basis in each of their classes. They need to know they aren't invisible to you.

4. Say thank you 

While it's great to encourage students with just the right compliment, that's not always easy to do. But it's not difficult to give your students a heartfelt "thank you." Show your appreciation for them. Model the behavior you want to see.

A sincere, heartfelt "thank you" shines your gratitude and appreciation in their direction. It shows them you care. Never, under any circumstances, say thank you in a sarcastic way, "Thank you for finally showing up on time for my class." You'll destroy any connection with that student and create a toxic classroom environment. There's no excuse for biting sarcasm from any educator. 

5. Praise your students

A recent article detailed some of the extraordinary benefits of giving praise to students. The more students were praised, the more engaged they were in their academic tasks. And the more they were scolded, the more they exhibited disengaged, unhelpful behaviors. Praise really works wonders.


I've heard teachers say, "I only want to praise a student when they've done something truly outstanding. I think it lessens the praise if I give it out too freely." Unfortunately, that is a personal preference and not what works best for kids.

Praise even the slightest of improvements. Don't miss a chance to lavish praise on your students. Be generous in your encouragement and affirmation. See the best in each of your students and let them know it. It will give them the confidence to succeed, and they will be forever grateful to you for it.
The person who will influence you the most is the person who believes in you and sees the best in you.
These tips are not difficult. They don't take a lot of time. They just require us to be more intentional. And they're a great start for building those connections. Deeper connection will require even more time, more energy, more conversations, and really getting to know students on a personal level. But you can never go wrong with getting started on the path of connecting with your students.

What are some of your tips for building connection with your students? I want to hear from you. Leave a comment below or respond on Facebook or Twitter.

Tuesday, June 11, 2019

What You Do Matters


How important are bus drivers? Our kids' safety is in their hands. They are the first point of contact in the morning and help set the tone for the day. Bus drivers make a difference. And so do cooks. And custodians. And everyone else who gives so much to the life of a school.

I was speaking last week at the Cypress-Fairbanks Rigor, Relevance, and Relationships Leadership conference in Houston. It was a great event, and I enjoyed making some wonderful connections with educators there.

One of the people I met shared some valuable wisdom with me. The conference provided a shuttle to and from the hotel, and my driver's name was Tammy.

She drives a school bus for the district, but she's not just a regular school bus driver. She substitutes for all the bus routes in the Cy-Fair district (one of the largest in Texas) wherever she's needed.

I can't imagine how difficult that must be to drive a different group of kids every day, on a different school bus, in city traffic, with your back turned to them. That takes a special skill set!

Tammy is amazing! I was inspired by her commitment and her kindness. I asked her how she handles working with so many different kids while navigating unfamiliar routes.

I'm paraphrasing what Tammy said...and then adding a few of my thoughts too. She shared great advice and encouragement!

1. "They can tell I enjoy them and love them. And that makes all the difference."

When kids know you care about them and accept them, you'll bring out the best in them. The quickest way to change another person's behavior is to change your behavior towards them. Every kid wants to feel like they are easy to love.

2. "When I ask them to do something, I address them as sir or m'am. And when they follow through, I say thank you."

Kids are going to make mistakes. But if you make it a point to enjoy being with them, and treat them with great respect and care, there is almost no mistake you can't correct. They'll be far more open to your feedback when they feel that you have the highest respect for them.

3. "When those middle school students realize they can't get under my skin, I have them right where I want them."

The kids are going to test you and see how you respond. If it's with anger or frustration, the situation is likely to escalate. If you are firm, polite, and also calm and caring, you'll get a much better result. Let them know you're in their corner even when you're correcting them.

4. "I keep doing this because they need me."

Tammy explained she had thought about retiring, but I could tell she also felt great satisfaction and purpose in what she's doing. She sees purpose and contribution in what she does. She's making things better with each interaction she has.

5. "I can tell you put your heart and soul into what you do."

She said that to me. I was so honored and humbled. She gave me a big hug when she dropped me off at the airport. And I'm not even that much of a hugger. She encouraged me and affirmed me and added value to me.

Who makes the difference in your school?

Every person who works in a school makes a difference. Every person contributes to the culture of the school. 

What if everyone in your school gave as generously as Tammy to love and support the kids and the adults in the school? What if we all showed a little more care and appreciation for every person in every interaction? That's how you build a strong school culture.

Who is someone who inspires you? How are you giving generously to others? Leave a comment below or respond on Facebook or Twitter. I would love to hear from you.

Monday, March 26, 2018

Why Do Some Educators Burn Out While Others Seem to Grow More Passionate?


I'm really interested to know where passion comes from. And that's because I can't think of a single passionate educator who doesn't make a greater impact for kids. And on the other hand, I can't think of a single educator who seems burned out who is still able to be their very best for kids.

Who wants a teacher for their child who doesn't have passion for what they're doing? Anyone?

There are so many benefits to being passionate. Passion overcomes and eliminates apathy. It makes us stronger and more willing to take on challenges. Passion is caring deeply about work that matters and doing something about it.

When we are feeling passionate, we have more energy and enthusiasm. We are energized and not victimized. We believe we can overcome obstacles. We are able to translate that passion into commitment and do hard things, really hard things to get the most out of our abilities. 

When you listen to someone who is burned out, they often point to circumstances as the reason for their malaise. There is lack of support, lack of resources, problems with students, parents, administrators, other teachers, lawmakers, the department of education, society, you name it. And all of those things might be true.

But others faced with exactly the same circumstances seem to tell themselves a different story. They view the challenges as something to learn from and overcome. They seem to think differently. They focus on solutions instead of problems. They don't deny the problems or the barriers, but they are determined to focus on things they can control and not on the things they can't.

So why are they able to stay positive and passionate in spite of the challenges while others burn out?

People who avoid burnout and develop more passion do the following:

1. They believe they are growing.

People need to feel like they are making progress. We are wired to make progress. So if we feel we are stuck and not getting stronger or more capable, it can make us feel hopeless. People who are growing always have hope that things can get better. 

2. They feel like they are making a difference.

People need to feel like what they do matters. They want to feel like they are creating and contributing. Some people are making a difference but all they see are the problems and the ways they aren't having success. And that's when they burnout. We need to celebrate the little successes we have and know we are making things better.

3. They have a strong sense of purpose.


People need to feel like their work is connected to an important cause. We need to feel like we're part of something bigger than ourselves. Passion flows from a strong sense of purpose. Burn out happens when we focus on problems instead of purpose.

4. They have a strong sense of autonomy.

Passionate people need to feel like they have some control over their destiny. We burn out when we feel we can't make the decisions or take the action needed to create change. But regardless of how much autonomy you actually have, you need to feel empowered by the autonomy you do have. There are certain things you always have autonomy over, like your attitude for instance.

5. They share and connect with other passionate educators.


The people you share with and connect with most will have a big influence on your outlook. If you are around passionate educators and connect with them, you will likely feel your passion growing stronger also. On the other hand, if you are consistently around people who are negative and who lack energy, you will start to feel that way too.

6. They know when to set aside the work to rest, renew, and recharge.

Passionate educators don't have to be martyrs. It's great to have a high level of commitment, but you also have to know when it's time to be content with what you've done and take some time to set aside the work. Constantly worrying about your kids or your classroom won't help you in the long run. Create some white space just for you to find peace and rest.

For the most part, our choices determine our level of passion more than our circumstances. You can't control the environment of your school or the kids who are placed in your class, but you can control so much. Most importantly, you can control your mindset.

What else would you add to these thoughts? What are your thoughts? I want to hear from you. Leave a comment below or respond on Facebook or Twitter.

Sunday, November 19, 2017

A Lesson On Gratitude


Tis the season of gratitude and thanksgiving, and the video below had me thinking about what it means to be grateful.

Have you ever heard the saying, "You started at third base but you thought you hit a home run?" The idea is that sure you are successful, you hit a home run, but it was due to the advantages you had as much as it was due to the way you hit the ball. After all, you started at third base.

The video below illustrates the idea of social and economic advantage and how these advantages can impact chances for future success. It's undeniable that certain starting points in life can create greater opportunities for success.

I think this video could be a great launching point for discussions with students. There is plenty to think about and even to critique. It's powerful, but there are plenty of opportunities for critical thinking.



So who should be grateful in this video? Some might say the kids with the most advantages. They have more to start with than the others after all. It's statistically true that people with those advantages tend to be more successful on average than those who do not.

But here's the thing about gratitude, it should not be dependent only on having more or even having enough. Gratitude is a state of mind that is available to all of us all of the time. 

After all, if you aren't grateful for what you have now, what makes you think you would be grateful if you had more? Unless you make a choice to be grateful in all things, how will it ever be enough?

It's very difficult to adopt this mindset in our consumer driven culture. Even in the video, the end goal is a $100 bill. We are constantly reminded of what we don't have. But life is not about racing past someone else to win. It's not about having the most money or toys.

Life has far more to offer than economic success. Some of the poorest people in the world live the most meaningful, happiest lives. They are finding joy in life in spite of having very little material wealth. Every day presents its blessings or burdens. We choose our focus.

Everyone has challenges in life and everyone has opportunities. Sure, some have more challenges and some have less, but everyone has the opportunity to choose two things: thoughts and actions. 

Will you choose to focus on your blessings or your burdens? Will you choose actions that lead to blessings or ones that lead to burdens?

Stephen Covey wrote, "I am not a product of my circumstances. I am a product of my decisions."

Ultimately, I believe this is true. We can rise above circumstances, eventually. It may not happen as fast as we'd like. There are many stories of people who have risen above, people who are overcomers. There are people who have overcome terrible hardships and horrific circumstances, even abuse and neglect. If it is true for some, why can't it be true for all?

For all the problems we have in this country, there are still incredible opportunities, even if the deck is stacked against some more than others. Are there inequities? Absolutely. Should we be satisfied with a system that works against some? Absolutely not. But there are also tremendous opportunities for those who choose to rise above.

We need to help all students learn to be grateful even in the midst of challenges. Why? The research is clear (Harvard Health)
Gratitude is strongly and consistently associated with greater happiness. Gratitude helps people feel more positive emotions, relish good experiences, improve their health, deal with adversity, and build strong relationships.
Gratitude is an empowering state of mind. It helps us realize that we have blessings in our life. It also helps us offer blessings into the lives of others. 

There may be difficulties and disparities in our world. There always have been injustices and as long a human being are running this planet, that will probably continue to be true.

I would summarize my response to the video I shared with two questions:

1. Who will you lift up?
2. What will you rise above?

Who will you lift up? You have gifts to give. You can be hope and help to someone else. You can lift up someone who might need a helping hand.

What will you rise above? There will be challenges. There will be obstacles. But you have everything you need to be great. Just keep moving in the direction of your dreams.

What's on your mind? I'd like to hear from you. Leave a comment below or share on Facebook or Twitter